Candles - Hey Monday
Design :
chinhwee
Coding :
Slippedaway
Brushes and font from :
Juvenile Casualty
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Ok... This is just a stress reliever for you all becoz of the stupid EOY papers... hahaha... Hope you all enjoy it..No offence though.. some are a bit sick..
One day there was a girl and some boys beside an apple tree. then, the boys ask the girl to climb the apple tree to pick some apples for them... actually the boys want to see her underwear.. Then, the girl's mother saw... after went back home.. her mother told her not to climb coz the boys' intention is to see her underwear..
Then... a few day later... the boys met the girl again.the boys ask her to gopicksome apples again... this time her mother saw it again... then. after the boys left. her mom tell her.. how many times should i tell you!! they want to see your underwear why dun you listen to me? ... but the girl reply... mom, this time I'm cleverer... i never wear underwear.
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. This being a big event, the girl tells her boyfriend that after dinner she would like to go out and have sex for the first time. Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy a 3-pack, a 10-pack, or a family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be very busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girls parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. Ten minutes pass and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to her boyfriend, "I had no idea you were so religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."
a mosquito n a praying mantis is watching a gal bathing the mosquito look at the gal chest and said "i bit her 10 years ago and it is still swollen" then the praying mantis look at her lower body and said "i cut her 12 years ago the cut is still there and it bleeds every month!"
Fruits Feast
A plane crash on an island, only three guys survived. They were captured by the cannibal tribe and brought before the chief. The chief said: "I will let you live if you manage to pass two trials." They got no other choice but to ask: "What will be the first trial?" Chief said: "Go into the forest and bring me ten fruits of the same kind."They thought: "That's easy." So three of them set off immediately.The first guy came back with ten apples. The chief told him that he had to stuff the ten apples into his ass without even making a noise to pass the second trial. The first one went in fine, but when the second one went in, he couldn't help but to scream in pain. He was chop into pieces and dump into the cooking pot with the apples he brought. The second guy came back with ten cherries, The chief told him that he had to stuff the ten cherries into his *** without even making a noise to pass the second trial. The first one went in fine, the second one also went in fine, everything went fine until the last one, then he couldn't help but to laugh out loud. He was chop into pieces and dump into the cooking pot with the cherries he brought.The first guy met the second guy in heaven and asked: "You could have survived, but why do you have to laugh at the last moment?" Second guy said: "I couldn't help it, because I saw the third guy coming back with durians."
LOST TONGUE TWISTER!
This is this cat
This is is cat
This is how cat
This is to cat
This is keep cat
This is an old cat
This is idiot cat
This is busy cat
This is for cat
This is forty cat
This is seconds cat
Now, go back and read the THIRD word in each line, starting at the top.
A guy and a girlfriend were in a car where the guy's driving...then they decided to play a fun game where they have to do rock, paper scissors and whoever loses each time must take off 1 piece of clothing..
somehow when the girl goes till not wearing any clothing, the car suddenly crashed
the girl was able to came out with one of her bf's shoe but her bf was still stuck in the car...
a car went passed and the girl asked for help
she used her bf's shoe to cover her private part and say:
"help! my boyfriend is stuck inside!" while pointing to the car
the person who wasnt looking at where shes pointing but at the shoe was amazed and said:
"ermm....if he's soo stuck inside till only got his shoe left then...i dunno how to help already
Dracula's wish
In hell...
dracula: u really wanted me to make a wish?
grim: yes! but only 3 wishes
dracula: ok then, my first wish is to have my skin as white as snow white!my second wish is that i am supplied with blood forever~and lastly i will get to be with ladies all the time ^^
grim: your wish has been granted..now you can reborn!
dracula: but what will i become?
grim: sanitary pad!
dracula: !!!@??%&$?#@$
Japanese occupation
Three Singaporeans, Ah Meng, Ah Seng and Ah Beng were caught by the Japanese soldiers during the Japanese Occupation and were thrown into prison awaiting for their day of execution by the firing squad...
Ah Meng told Ah Seng and Ah Beng: "I heard that the Japanese is very scared of natural disasters. Maybe if we can shout out the natural disasters at the critical moment, we may be able to escape and save ourselves."
Ah Seng and Ah Beng nodded their heads in agreed to try out the plan.
The next day, Ah Meng was the first to be put in front of the firing squad.
The Captain shouted, "READY.... AIM...." and Ah Meng immediately shouted out, "EARTHQUAKE!! EARTHQUAKE!!"
The frightened soldiers ran for cover on hearing that and Ah Meng managed to escape.
On the second day, it's Ah Seng's turn at the firing squad....
The Captain again shouted, "READY.... AIM...." and Ah Seng quickly shouted, "FLOOD!! FLOOD!!"
Again the soldiers ran for cover on hearing that and Ah Seng escaped.
Knowing that his two friends had successfully escaped, Ah Beng kept telling himself that timing is very important. He must be able to shout the natural disaster at the right time to escape.
On the third day, it's now Ah Beng's turn at the firing squad. He kept telling himself that timing is very important.. timing is very important...
Then the Captain shouted his commands, "READY.... AIM...." and Ah Beng promptly shouted, "FIRE!! FIRE!!" and the rest is history!
Coming more next time... BYEE
10:09 PM
